One-Eyed Musings

Stuck at home and peering at everything using one eye has its ups and downs.

The Ups

1. Watching Channel 76 on Astro like a motherhumper. I love E! because you can watch it like a mindless zombie hooked on frivilous entertainment facts and not human blood. It makes me feel like I'm on holiday and reading light-readin' magazines like US Weekly. Except its available 24/7. I know how Drew Barrymore and Jeremy Thomas's divorce papers look like 'cos I saw it on THS: Drew Barrymore (THS stands for True Hollywood Story for all you living without cable) and if that is not a completely mindless and frivilous fact, I don't know what is.
2. On MC and thankfully not suffering from an illness that could lead to death, but still not able to go to work is kinda like being on a well-deserved holiday 'cept you're stuck at home watching E!.
3. Being able to watch teenage son like a hawk ogre, because mocks are around the corner.
4. Pulling all the stops to make Willow love me more.

The Downs

1. Being One-Eyed Emma is no fun because your eye looks freaky, everything you see is wonky and since your depth of perception is impaired, you tend to break dishes.
2. Not being AT work, but still have to DO work suck eggs (but someone's gotta do it).
3. Just not used to being Ogre Mom, nor having teenage son witness transformation.
4. Willow still treats me with a certain degree of arrogance. Even after I feed her Bobby's Secret Stash For Willow, a can of Rabbit and Venison Gourment Cat Meal.

And to answer Miracle Max's question whether I would choose The Princess Bride or a Johnny Depp filled Pirates of the Caribbean, I'd have to say if not for the presence of simpering Kiera Knightly (whom I would gladly feed to the R.O.U.S. or Rodents of Unusual Size), there might have been a fight. There's just so much hotness one can realistically take.

Cartoon snagged from here.

Comments

[3 stripes]

Haha.. more reason to blog :) I love E! too